


Are You Sure You're Not a Demon?

by QueenofSin



Category: Magnus Chase and the Gods of Asgard - Rick Riordan
Genre: One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-27
Updated: 2021-02-27
Packaged: 2021-03-18 17:14:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,297
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29737185
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/QueenofSin/pseuds/QueenofSin
Summary: Magnus is eating lunch with Hall Nineteen, when he is very rudely interrupted.
Comments: 3
Kudos: 15





	Are You Sure You're Not a Demon?

**Author's Note:**

> Wow... I was meaning to post something much sooner than this. But, the problem is, I am extraordinarily critical of my writing, and so I have literally no idea if what I write is actually shit or not. And I really don't want to post something that's shit. But I won't know if nobody reads it... so here we are. Please feel free to tell me how to improve with this.

Magnus was confused. Also quite irritated. Both of these relatively fresh moods could be attributed to the fact that halfway through eating lunch with his hallmates, he had suddenly disappeared from the table and was now in some kind of empty space. And it was Falafel Friday.

Magnus looked around. It was grey mist, as far as the eye could see. He appeared to be hovering, which was terrifying, but best not thought about. Nothing was changing, except for a distant light that appeared to be getting closer.

Hang on, no, he was flying towards the light. As Magnus grew closer, he began to make out shapes in the light. It seemed there were people in it.

Magnus flew face-first into the light, and instinctively closed his eyes so he wouldn’t be blinded. He felt himself falling, and landed painfully on some kind of hard floor. His senses were sending him some very mixed signals – someone was saying something.

“Rise, Demon! Rise, spawn of Satan! Rise and speak your unholy atrocities!”

Magnus slowly opened his eyes. He was in a chamber, in what appeared to be a cathedral. He was laying in a pentagram, surrounded by hooded figures. They were looking at him expectantly.

The person who had spoken before coughed. Magnus looked at them, although he could not see their face, hidden behind a mask.

“Demon, rise!”

“Excuse me?”

Magnus was confused as to why they apparently though he was a demon, but this response caused the assembled figures to frantically whisper amongst themselves.

The leader raised a hand. “Silence!”

They turned to Magnus. “What, Demon? What confuses you?”

Magnus carefully stood up, causing more tittering. “Well… It’s that, you see, I have no idea what’s going on here. But I’m not a demon. My name is Magnus.

The people around him seemed to be shocked by this. “Silence!” The leader shouted again. “What do you mean, you’re not a Demon?”

Magnus looked around. “I… I’m just not a demon. I really am quite confused as to what’s happening.”

“You’re not a Demon?”

“No…”

The leader’s shoulders slumped. “But… We summoned you. You have to be a Demon.”

Magnus shrugged. “You definitely summoned me. Well done on that, by the way – That’s some cool magic. But I’m not a demon. I was just having lunch with my friends when I disappeared.”

Someone in the circle piped up. “But the spell couldn’t have gone wrong. It was given to our leader, Lady Naxos by the Dark Lord himself.”

The aforementioned Lady Naxos frantically signaled at him to be quiet. She turned to Magnus. “Despite Initiate Malcolm’s poor grasp on the concept of secrecy, he is not incorrect. It was given to me by our lord Lucifer in order to initiate the dark conquest of Earth with a legion of Demons. So you must be a Demon”

“Did he appear in a dream to you?”

Lady Naxos gasped, and the circle began loudly whispering amongst themselves. “How did you know that?!”

“Did he speak with a Boston accent?”

“I- well, yes, but-“

“Did he attempt to convince you to eat Pop-Tarts?”

She glared at him suspiciously. “…Yes.”

Magnus closed his eyes. Why had it been Magnus, who had been chosen by the cruel dice roll of Fate, to deal with Loki?

“That was not Satan. And I am definitely not a demon.”

Naxos seemed unsure of what to do. Another cultist spoke up. “Lady Naxos, surely we could test his magical energy? And if he has none, then we’ll know he’s not a demon.”

Magnus held his breath for a moment as the Lady considered her options. It didn’t take her long to make a choice. “Very well.”

After that, nothing happened. Magnus waited for a few seconds. “Am I missing something h-“

A burst of malignant thoughts entered his mind, as some hostile entity crawled inside and searched around. Every nasty thought he’d ever had came back to him, every person he’d ever pickpocketed, every time he’d thought about how hot it would be if Alex-

He gasped, as he snapped back to the cathedral.

The Lady sighed. “Well, he’s no saint, although he’s certainly had his ups and downs morally, but he has no magical energy of any kind. Apart from some weird… Elf Sayder thing? Whatever it is, it’s not Biblical.”

Magnus breathed a sigh of relief. Lucky for Magnus that she hadn’t looked too hard at that, otherwise she might figure out there was a lot more to it. “So, seeing as I’m not a demon, can you please send me back now?”

What appeared to be Naxos’ second in command whispered in her ear. “Good question, Gertrude. If it wasn’t the Dark Lord… you wouldn’t happen to know who it was?”

**_“_** Well, it wasn’t the Holy Father.”

Everyone looked over to the pews. Lounging across one was Magnus’ least favourite God.

“Loki.”

“Hey, Magnus! Long time no see!”

Loki stood up and walked into the aisle. He was wearing a waistcoat, slacks and a newsboy cap. All in all, he looked very Peaky Blinders.

Lady Naxos frowned at him. “You.”

Loki grinned at her. “Me. I just wanted to say, by the way, thank you for doing my work for me. Considering I can only project physically for a limited amount of time, you’ve made my job a lot easier. I’ll repay the favour by sending you straight to your Dark Lord! But before I do that, I do need to take Maggie here as bait. If you wouldn’t mind stepping aside.”

She looked at Magnus, then at Loki. Then back at Magnus.

“You sure you aren’t a Demon?”

“Positive.”

“Not even a little bit?”

“No, I’m sorry.”

The Lady snapped her fingers. “Then I suppose we’re somewhat obligated to help you. Herbert! Send him home. Everybody else, Sacrament Two!”

Loki chuckled, and began sauntering over. “I am a deity from beyond your petty Bible. You think you can take me?”

“You’re still a dark being. And dark beings can be sent back where they came from. Which in your case would be… a cave with a snake eternally dripping poison on you.”

Loki’s eyes widened, and he sprang towards the circle. However, dark beams from everybody in the circle slammed into him, holding him in place.

“Now! Send him back, Herbert!” Lady Naxos commanded, with a strained voice.

Herbert began muttering under his breath and scattering pungent salts and oils around Magnus in an unrecognizable pattern. “Right, that’s done. Now, just say: “I call on the Dark One to send me back.”

Magnus looked at Herbert. “Would you mind giving Lady Naxos a message from me?”

He shrugged. “It’s your life we’re risking by wasting time here, mate.”

“Tell her: ‘For a cult of Satan worshipping cultists bent on world domination, you’re not so bad.’ “

Herbert spat at Magnus’ feet. “Whatever, heathen. Now say the line.”

Magnus closed his eyes, and recited the line. “I call on the Dark One to send me back.”

He felt himself be sucked back through the light, and within seconds was back in the grey mist. Suddenly all was quiet. No Loki, no cultists.

As he saw another light grow closer, he closed his eyes, and braced for impact. However, it was unnecessary, as he appeared back in his seat, half eaten pate of falafel in front of him. However, his hallmates were gone.

“I just don’t understand… He literally just disappeared!”

Magnus turned around. His hallmates were walking dejectedly back to their table, and hadn’t noticed him yet.

“Hey guys! I’m back!”

They all looked up, and rushed over to him, with cries of “What the fuck happened?” and “Are you okay?” Everybody looked at him expectantly.

“Okay, you guys aren’t gonna believe this, but…”


End file.
